Friday, June 15, 2007

yesterday at work I forgot something, something which was really very important and it was right under my nose. or rather in front of my eyes
I won’t write what it was I forgot since I’m pretty sure that might be breaking a law of some sort. you’ll just have to take my word for the importance of the incident.


the part I forgot could easily have been quite dangerous to one of the residents of the old-folks home, luckily it wasn’t, but just the mere thought of the possible consequences still makes me feel queasy. I spent most part of yesterday afternoon trying to figure out how it could have happened and I couldn’t think of one single explanation.
coming to work today and having to write a report about the incident with no legitimate excuse for my actions made it even worse, if something might have happened that morning which hade made me distracted then sure. ok. it might be understandable. but no. I just have myself to blame. me and my absent-mindedness. which pretty much made me dread coming to work today.


it makes me wonder that if I miss something as important as this, what else am I missing? am I responsible enough for this type of work? or to drive a car? and what if I one day become a teacher, will I be responsible enough to be trusted with the students? this incident has shaken my confidence in so many ways. and maybe it should, if it would be easy for me to brush it off it probably wouldn’t do me any good, right? I wouldn’t learn anything from it and just repeat it next week. which I swear I wont.
after I wrote the, in lack of a better word, discrepancy report R told me that he had done it at least twenty times and that made me feel quite a bit better, but am I entitled to that??

1 comment:

Sara said...

Honey!

I think I know aht you're talking about. You know, I'm in the business too. And I think I did the exact same thing the other day. I know the anxiety you feel. It's horrible. But we have to remember that we are human beings, and we make mistakes. Everyone does them. And sometimes a bit of anxiety is good, since you learn more from the mistake. So take it to your heart, but not too much. Brush it off, and hopefully you will become an even better worker!

You can always call me, you know!
Love Sara